The Fourth Fleet, a tongue-in-the-cheek fantasy

    The action tales place on a fine sandy beach somewhere in the Caribbean. Its Admiral Willy Seaman who is speaking.

    "You know perfectly well that all we want is to help you."

    The young man called Juan Blanco, with dark skin and eyes, who has just given the Admiral his second glass of beer, sinks his toes into the warm sand and lowers his eyes.

    "Yes, of course I know that. You guys only want to help us. It's just that..."

    "What? Out with it! You want to say we're pirates just because we have faster ships than you do!"

    "No, no, please, don't take it the wrong way. It's just, well, don't you think we can help ourselves?"

    "Don't be silly! You know as well as I do that the world is filled with evil minded characters. That's why we have decided to reactivate the Fourth Fleet. Imagine! Eleven ships and an aircraft carrier!"

     "That's what is bothering me: why such a big fleet?"

     "The bigger the better!"

     "Doesn't that give you an uneven advantage?"

     "Why? Don't you realize that we have brought the Fourth Fleet back to life to protect the maritime security of the Western Hemisphere, keep an eye on terrorists and drug traffikers and lend a helping hand wherever needed?"

     "I know, I know, it sounds nice...but we down here just can't help remembering the U.S. invasions of Panama, of Mexico, of the Dominican Republic..."

     "Oh come on! You know we are on your side. It's either us or the enemy..."

     "That's what I mean: who is the enemy? Didn't you used to say it was the Communists?"

     "True! Very good Johnny! But you know as well as I do that times change. A long time ago it was the Red Skins, dictators here and there, the Communists, now the terrorists and the populists like that guy in Caracus, what's his name? You know, man, times change and so do the enemies. But we are here to protect you. You've got to understand that. We have the world's biggest and best democracy, we care about human rights, we are a Christian nation, our companies operate all over the world..."

    "That's the point: might your fleet really have in mind the defense of those companies? Or keeping tabs on guys like Hugo Chaves, that guy in Ecuador who doesn't want that U.S. base in Manta, what's his name? Rafael Correa, and then that indigenous guy in Bolivia, Evo Morales, and..."

    "Hmm. Who have you been talking to Johnny? Of course we want to keep an eye on them. Just imagine: we get about a third of our oil from Latin America, mostly Venezuela and Mexico, and you've got lot's of other resources that could come in handy at a time of crisis. We don't have anything against those guys, really, as long as they don't start acting up. Let's face the facts. You don't stand a chance without us."

    "I think I get your point. But there's another idea that bothers me."

    "Out with it!"

    "Well, you know, all of those military coups and then those multi-million dollar loans, and the idea that we had to sell off our companies and land and accept the belt tightening of the IMF and..."

    "Don't let those pink ideas get into your head, young man, it's not convenient."

    "It's just that, well, I read in the papers the the U.S. government is spending millions of dollars to support or buy out private businesses and my head begins to swim.."

    "Relax. Don't sweat. Things well work out, I assure you. Now, could you please get me another beer? Ice cold and with some tit bits? That's a good boy!"

    Juan blanco stands up and as he trudges towards the beer house on the beach front, he mutters to himself: "at least we're talking. That's a positive sign, isn't it?"